Acadia National Park, Maine on a cold, foggy day in May 2017.
On the path of spiritual development, we often think we are not “feeling” anything because, deep down, what we really want is to feel like we are “all that” in front of God. We expect to experience spiritual fireworks and a feeling that we have “arrived”. When we don’t feel that way, we decide that we have failed, and that we should give up trying.
The goal of drawing nearer to God isn’t to experience fireworks. The outcome won’t be climbing mountains and flying with the stars- the outcome will be seeing deeper into the closest, simplest things and realizing that the thing we needed most was right in front of us after all.
Do you not see that when you are fasting, you spend the day craving brownies and lasagna and halal bacon cheeseburgers and milkshakes, but when you have completed the fasting day, the veil is lifted from your eyes and you realize that all you ever really wanted was a simple sip of humble, pure, water?
So stop expecting triple milkshakes with whipped cream, hot fudge, sprinkles, and a cherry on top as the reward for your attempts to draw nearer to God. God will reward you with the joy of simple, pure water- and He will make it more beloved to you than all the milkshakes in the world.